The_last_man_on_earth_2x04 File

But I’m trying to change! I’m a new Tandy. I’m the reformed Tandy. I agreed to five weeks in this dog house instead of one! That’s how committed I am to showing them that the old, lying, ball-pool-diving Phil Miller is dead and buried. I just want to sit at the table again. I want to share a block of government-issue apocalypse cheese without feeling like I need to lie about who ate the last slice.

(He sighs deeply, resting his chin as much as the wooden board allows.) The_last_man_on_earth_2x04

I did that crime, I gotta do that time. C to the T. Classic Tandy. But I’m trying to change

It’s just... it's lonely out here. The world ended. Practically everyone we ever knew or loved was wiped out by a virus. And here we are, the last handful of human beings left on the giant blue marble, and I am locked in a box. We have all the space in the world, and I have about three square feet. I agreed to five weeks in this dog house instead of one

(He looks off to the side, his eyes suddenly catching a flick of light. He blinks, focusing.)

(The scene is pitch black. The sound of crickets and crashing ocean waves fills the background. A tight spotlight illuminates a wooden stockade. Tandy's head and hands are locked in place. Around his neck is a glowing shock collar. He is sweaty, exhausted, and desperately trying to maintain his trademark false optimism.)